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Friday, March 30, 2012

Nikon FE2 - 1st Roll

Yet again we have a new camera to add to our growing collection. It's no surprise that my itch for a camera that uses 35 mm film led H to buy one for myself and two more for him. Do we need that many cameras? No. Is my husband forming a new hobby? Yes. We currently have 5 film cameras - 3 toy cameras & 2 nifty oldies.

Let us welcome the Nikon FE2 to the family with a post of some recent pictures:

posing for the camera with his new zolibot cup in hand 

a super posed shot of the hubs and me

taking an evening break at Starbucks

coming into the bathroom to say good morning to H

yes, he knows how to pose for the camera

babies make for very blurry subjects

coming to the door to find out what daddy is doing outside

he looks a little chunky here

omg... I LOVE these bath time photos

this one is especially adorable

and I had to censor his boy parts for this one

We were anxious to process the photos and brought them to Walgreens. Big mistake. It was expensive and the quality wasn't stellar (note the chemical leak in the first 2 photos). Next time we're going to have them developed at Costco. 

Stay tune for more old school film goodness! Hoping to finish up a few rolls and have them processed by next week.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Current Status

I've been told that it gets better. In some ways it most definitely has, but in other ways I feel like it is getting harder. Everyday is different. I face new challenges. I still feel defeated.

Psst... most days I don't like being a SAHM. I have lost my identity and the role of being a mother and wife has taken over. I don't have a life anymore. I want social interaction that goes beyond speaking to an 11 month old. I want to know that there is a possibility of me having a career in the future. I want to take a break and be carefree, but I am responsible for so much. I want to hire help. I want to take a small load off my shoulders.

Oh what a rant...

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

A Lot On My Mind

I have taken a break from blogging and many other activities as well. I have been a bit "off" as of late, and I'm not sure how to get out of this funk. I think I am just so overwhelmed by the thoughts that are usually racing in my head. I can't even concentrate on one thought for more than a minute before something else comes up.

My life seems very simple. Take care of child, husband, and home. While it sounds easy, it's not. The daily everyday tasks are so much harder to do with an active child added to the mix. My "job" never ends, and I feel so unaccomplished by the end of the day because there is always so much more that needs to be done. Sigh.

Hamming It Up!
his adorable squinty eye smiles helps me get through those long days

I spend a lot of time thinking about my past. I don't know why. I just do  My husband only remembers the good things in life and never dwells upon the bad. I remember it all. I think about the bad decisions I have made in my life and wish I could have done things differently. I also think about the good happy memories of times spent with my husband. I think about those memories and long for the carefree nature of our relationship to return. Then reality sets back in, and I think about how impossible that is now with a child.

Driving Adventure
one of our spur of the moment adventures to HMart with the top down in the Miata last February

I spend a lot of time thinking about the future too. My little kiddo is growing up, and every little new development brings him one step closer to being a toddler. He is always changing, and we are always adapting to new routines. How will our family be different 6 months from now? Then I think of where we will be a year from now. What about 5 years from now? Will I still be a SAHM? Will we have more kids? So many questions. The future kind of scares me because it is the unknown. Do I have control of my future? Do I know where I'm headed?

Family Picture
what will our family photo look like next year?

I think a lot. That would explain the name of this blog...

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Yashica - 1st Roll of Film

Tada! Here is H's first roll of film shot in black and white with his Yashica Mat 124G.

Miata in the Garage 
his car in the garage

Living Room
our super lame unbalanced living room that is always a work in progress

Editing Photos
editing photos & daydreaming about yummy food

Drinking Water
drinking water like it's my job

Christmas Tree
our Christmas tree with lots of presents underneath

Holding Hands
date night at European Bistro

Ready to Eat
Baby E waits for lunch

Feeding Elliot
feeding Baby E one spoonful at a time

In the Closet 
a view inside our disorganized mess of a closet & check out his camera!

the refinery

With both rolls of film developed, we are super excited to keep experimenting with our special cameras. I didn't think I would be the type to ever get into photography, but the appeal is definitely drawing me in. Plus it's an extra bonus to have such a cute subject to work with (yes, that's you Baby E). I'm thinking of getting another toy camera that uses 35mm film. It would give me more freedom to click as many times as I want, and it's cheaper to develop. While I'm dreaming, maybe I'll even add an instant camera to my wish list. :)