Posing for a picture with Baby E at his first Newark Nite
It's 6:30 AM, and I have only had 2 hours of sleep. I am a mother.
After picking up Baby E from Uncle Anthony & Aunt Melissa's house, we came home around midnight. I immediately went upstairs to pump for 30 minutes. I then stayed up another 2 hours to pump again, afraid that I would wait too long between pump sessions. I fell asleep for 2 hours and woke up again to pump. I pump to provide my son with food. I am a mother, his mother.
While cleaning my pump parts and preparing bottles, I hear Baby E cry. It is time for his feeding, and I cannot go back to bed. I feed him. I change him. He is not very happy with me. Maybe it's because he is still sleeping and doesn't understand what's going on. Poor little guy. H comes over to calm him down. He is now awake and ready to finish eating. My heart melts just looking at him. I am a mother, his mother.
I went outside in the rain to spray down his dirty diaper. I touch poo more than the average person, and I don't mind it. I wash diapers on a daily basis, and I feel good knowing that his bum is healthy. I am a mother, his mother.
Now I can't go back to sleep. I am hungry, so hungry. Even though I can't say that I breastfeed, I do exclusively pump. I burn calories just like those mothers who actually breastfeed. I didn't eat nearly enough yesterday. It wasn't by choice. It was by circumstance. Did you know that I need an extra 500 calories a day? While pregnant, I only needed an extra 300 a day. I actually eat more now than I ever did when I was pregnant. I have quite the appetite. The kind of appetite that is keeping me from sleeping. I am a mother.
My job is to be the best mother possible to Baby E. My work hours are not limited to the weekday from 9:00 AM - 5:00 PM. I work around the clock, often lacking much needed sleep. That's okay because I am his mother.